Because love is funny-strange, but it’s also funny ha-ha.
We’ve all heard that love is patient and love is kind, but have you ever thought about how hilariously funny love and romantic relationships can be as well?
That’s right. As any stand up comic can tell you, love can bring a chuckle, giggle or a side-splitting laugh out of just about anyone you’ll meet.
When you’re in love, you are automatically having a good time. You are with the person you adore the most, and anything you do with them brings a smile to your face, even when they’re annoying you worse than anyone has before! So naturally, your dating and love life are sure to be full of some downright entertaining moments.
And some of the common experiences we all share in loving another can best be summed up with short, funny love quotes from our favorite comedians and humorists.
Of course, there are also parts of love that don’t seem funny at first, but that you find yourself laughing about it later on. Bad breakups, fights and misunderstandings may arise and put a strain on things. But once you are able to work through it with your partner, you’re also able to see the humor in the situation.
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After all, life would be a lot less interesting if we didn’t operate that way. Could you imagine a humor-less society? Ugh. That would be horrible.
Thank heavens for comedians and their interesting outlook on everything that goes on in our world!
Being able to evaluate hard situations and find a sort of silver lining somewhere within it all is truly a gift. And it’s something we can all learn from, because it’s important to remember not to take everything too seriously.
Life is a lot easier to take on when everything isn’t always so big and scary and you can chuckle at situations.
There’s a funny thing about love and relationships … and it’s called everything.
Thankfully, some of our favorite comedians can relate, and we found the best funny love quotes they’ve spoken or written to prove it. Not only are these phrases hilarious, they’re 100 percent spot-on, and from some of the world’s most famous, influential people to date.
Here are the 31 best short and funny love quotes from comedians that perfectly nail the craziness of dating, sex and relationships.
1. Who your partner really is will always be revealed.
“Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” — Will Ferrell
2. Just look at all the options.
“I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough.” — Russell Brand
3. Sometimes it’s hard to find.
“I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” — Rita Rudner
4. Emojis don’t speak louder than words.
“If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back.” — Chelsea Peretti
5. Tell the truth no matter what.
“Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.” — Natasha Leggero
6. It really is the little things, isn’t it?
“I miss crawling into a man’s arm, kissing his neck, saying those three little words into his ear, ‘And another thing …’” — Felicia Michaels
7. You don’t truly know someone until you love them.
“My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.” — Garry Shandling
8. Fake it ’til you make it.
“Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.” — Richard Jeni
9. Love needs repeating.
“If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?” — Lily Tomlin
10. Try to be a good husband, even when you fail.
“Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.” — Jerry Seinfeld
11. Who could argue with that?
“My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.” — Joan Rivers
12. Ignorance is bliss.
“Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.” — Chelsea Handler
13. Don’t need to see it to believe it.
“Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” — George Burns
14. Find someone impartial.
“I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.” — Groucho Marx
15. Let your love flag fly.
“I was like, Am I gay? Am I straight? And I realized … I’m just slutty. Where’s my parade?” — Margaret Cho
16. Does love ever truly fade?
“If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something.” — Fran Lebowitz
17. Feelings suck.
“Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers.” — Richard Pryor
18. Compliments are key.
“There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.” — Chris Rock
19. It’s all about the lighting.
“My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.” — Rodney Dangerfield
20. Or is it all about compromise?
“I can’t make you love me, but I can fill my pantry with your favorite snacks and offer you a weekly stipend of $75.” — Rob Delaney
21. Impress your family by getting married.
“My brother is gay and my parents don’t care, as long as he marries a doctor.” — Elayne Boosler
22. Finances won’t always be even.
“My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.” — Ray Romano
23. Gotta love a wise guy
“Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I spin around and pin the guy’s arm behind his back. Now who’s asking the questions?” — Jack Handy
24. Never let them go …
“I say if you love something, set it in a small cage and pester and smother it with love until it either loves you back or dies.” — Mindy Kaling
25. Take the high road.
“Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you’re offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone’s feelings.” — David Sedaris
26. Marriage is a nice trade-off.
“Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.” — Phyllis Diller
27. What lies in a kiss.
“A kiss may not be the truth but it is what we wish were true.” — Steve Martin as Harris Telemacher in “L.A. Story”
28. Confidence always works.
“Women love a self-confident bald man.” — Larry David
29. Some prefer to travel for what they want.
“Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.” — Jackie Mason
30. Love means knowing what really matters
“It’s the 21st century. I don’t need an alpha male to protect me. I don’t need a big, strong man to fight off a tiger. I need a geek who can get my naked photos off the cloud.” — Whitney Cummings
31. Get a Carfax if you need to.
“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” — Erma Bombeck